Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Message for the Stagnant and Heartbroken

Recently, I have been running into several people experiencing high degrees of dissatisfaction with regards to their personal lives, specifically within the scope of partners and mates. Regardless of the language you use, we are all in some way, looking for love. The price is often way higher than it should be because there isn't an agreement between body and spirit. Instead of coming to an understanding within, we tend to look without our whole selves intact. The body and the spirit must agree, otherwise there is conflict. That conflict leads to dis-ease and then it's all down hill from there.

The saying goes when discussing love, "If you look for it, you won't find it." I tend to agree and think that "If you are ready and open for it, love will find you." But what does that mean to be ready and open? How can you tell if you are ready to be in a relationship, or when it's time to leave one? The key to these questions lie in how committed you are to ensuring your human success. The earth plane requires a great deal more attention to detail than most people are willing to acknowledge. It all boils down to honest self-evaluation and awareness. The following are things that I have learned and observed in the past few weeks, use them as you see fit.

*Who are you? There is no way to create effective and functional relationships with others, if you have no clue as to who you are. We are living in a time where masking our feelings, desires and even ourselves, is the call of the day. Like any lie, after awhile, it starts to unravel, until the truth is staring you right in the face. Be honest about who you are. You will attract the person that most reflects you on the inside. (Scary isn't it?)

*Be faithful. The universe does not want you to fail, but who is to say that you don't? We receive messages all day long, that are only of any real use, when listened to. Your spirit lies within certain parts of your body, your gut is one of them. You need to trust yourself and have faith in spirit. If something feels wrong, don't think it out to be right. We all have communities that love us and hold us dear, even when we screw up. Let the love of those that are true to you be your measuring stick, not the fear that comes in when faith is lacking.

*Be honest.
There are a number of folks out there who are not being honest with the people they are with and there are several folks, taking shit from people in return. You have to take charge of your life and be clear on what you want and what you don't want. Any relationship worth having is worth working on, BUT to what extent? Don't confuse compromise with martyrism.

*Be consistent. We tend to be very inconsistent and then wonder why we have relationship issues. We say we want someone who is affectionate and then date people who are cold. We say we want someone who will accept us for who we are and then marry a critic. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Strike a balance between what is possible and what really matters to you and be consistent.

*Relate on your level. This is the biggest hit that I have gotten throughout the course of the past two weeks. "Level" in this case, does not relate to hierarchy, as much as it relates to self-awareness. As people come together there is a vetting process that should take place. At some point in every relationship, we all realize that someone is either on or not on, our level. It is not rocket science and it usually glaringly apparent. Even if you can't see it, your friends and family usually can. A functional relationship is functional because both parties share more than similarities, they have a mutual understanding about their place in the world and see a common goal that is attainable regardless, of whether that other person is in his or her life. When you are with someone on your own level, you are able to be a whole person, instead of the "two halves" rhetoric that is often associated with relationships, particularly marriage.

Heartbreak, disappointment and loss are part of life, because they teach us the lessons we need to learn in order make life on the earth plane fulfilling. Unfortunately the lack of communication between body and spirit keep us making the same mistakes over and over again. If you really want love in your life, open your eyes--it's all around you. Bring your body and spirit to the table and agree on a path forward, the rest will work itself out.

Humbly,

IA