Iya Agba: Purple Sessions

A Work in Progress..

2011-09-19T14:13:00.002-04:00

Greetings!

It has been quite a minute since my last post, but alas, here I am again. My path continues to be full of lessons and I am finding myself, yet again, at another crossroads-so to speak. In working on the various projects that my passions continue to place me in, I am finding more and more that the energy I need to sustain myself needs is immense. It is a good thing that there is a limitless supply to go around.

Recently, I decided to revisit the James Redfield's best-selling novel, The Celestine Prophecy. I started it years ago and for some reason stopped right before the eighth insight was revealed. This time around, I purchased the audiobook instead, and took the content for another spin. Despite its sometimes "hoakey" approach to coincidences and story-telling style, the content regarding energy, conflict, scarcity and control dramas, was so enlightening that I found myself really re-examining how I approach my life and the people in it.

In fact, it is because of the revisit to The Celestine Prophecy that I have a new presentation that will be presented at the next The Red Tent Symposium for Women in October. This issue of control dramas and how they lead to conflict, really moved me. As I listened, I remembered the "a ha!" feeling I had when I first read the book. His basic point that control dramas are essentially a fight for energy and that this is what leads to conflict, is so aptly relevant and a necessary message to the world. Now, years later, while I still agree with Redfield's initial four (Intimidator, Interrogator, Aloof and Poor Me), based on my observations, have expanded this area with two of my own (Martyr and Posturer). Control dramas are dangerous for two main reasons: 1) they prevent all of us from receiving the messages regarding our life paths that according to The Celestine Prophecy, come easier when we are open to receive, and 2) control dramas are self-perpetuating, as they play out all they do is re-affirm their existence.

Used on a daily basis, I have found that being aware of our own control dramas is a great way to enhance our spiritual openness. Understanding that there is a limitless supply of energy through meditation, heavily forested environments, prayer, and even exercise forces us to be more aware. Understanding when we are depleted, forces us to stay aware. And while the term "force"may seem harsh in the space of spiritual openness, the fact is that change for many of us can only be achieved when we have a sense of urgency.

With my revisit to the area of control dramas, I am able to better serve my needs and the needs of those around me. As one client so eloquently put it, "It [control dramas] helps me not hate people, when I realize that they really can't help themselves. They want energy and don't know how else to get it." Yes, this is a very strong sentiment, but what it has done for this client is allow for an honesty that she has been struggling to attain for many months. By accepting her aloofness as a control drama, she has been able to examine her issues on a more real level. The changes in her are astounding!

We are all works in progress. By accepting this without judgment and being aware of how we fight for energy, we can begin to find better ways to energize ourselves without the need to engage our control dramas. Staying connected to the higher source is key for a more energized and fulfilled existence. This, for most people, is not a new understanding, but the effect of the disconnect from that higher sources still plagues humans across the globe. What will it take for a conscious shift? I think it is simply a matter of time. As I move forward, everything I learn only serves as confirmation. We are all capable of balanced lives. Change comes only when we accept the truth that we all need energy, and will do anything to get it. Once this is revealed, the real work can begin.

IA

August Newsletter

2010-08-04T13:49:00.009-04:00

Hot off of my computer! Here is the latest edition of Smile Herb Shop's "Inner Smile", the newsletter for which I serve as editor. In this issue, we get you ready for the Back to School transition. Highlights include:

-Natural remedies for ADD/ADHD
-Herbs for transition
-Aromatherapy and Supplement suggestions
-Upcoming classes

There is also a coupon for the "Bring a Friend" promotion now running until August 31st. Just click on the image and get the full newsletter. Enjoy!

Fridays at Smile

2010-07-16T19:01:00.004-04:00

This morning around 5am the entire house started to shake. I suspected it was an earthquake, but dismissed it as a ridiculous notion, since after all this is Maryland. It was a short episode, but I felt shaken inside in a way that I had never experienced. I had no control over whatever it was that had just happened. I couldn't make it stop. I awoke later to find that my intuition was in fact spot on. I had experience, albeit a minor one, my first earthquake. Later that morning, I went to my trainer who put me through an intense workout. He offered up a smoothie as a reward and then it happened-"ACHOO!"

I sneezed and thus started what might possibly be the second flu-like illness this summer! Already since that first sneeze, I have been battling the headaches, sinus congestion, sneezing and slight fever associated with illness. The last bout was a month ago. It left me drained and seriously considering the emergency room. I thought then, like I do now that there must be a connection.

Fast forward to my shift this evening at Smile. I spoke to a customer on the phone who was suffering from constipation due to IBS/colitis. I could hear her frustration as she explained the past few months of special diets, loss of energy and imbalance. I recommended a remedy for her current condition and then made suggestions for long-term maintenance. At this point I should share that I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis in 1998. It started out as IBS and progressed from there. It was by far, the most debilitating physical experience of my life and it really took a great deal of soul searching to find a solution. I had listened to the doctor's recommendations to no avail. At some point, I started listening to myself.

My doctor was convinced that I had some sort of infection despite all of the negative test results. When I asked if my condition could be stress related, she looked at me and said quite confidently, "Nobody is that stressed." I, of course knew better and believed that there was a connection between what was clearly happening to me physically and what I couldn't grasp emotionally/spiritually. Once I made the connection, I made a decision to reclaim my physical self, by acknowledging those things hidden deep within. It was from this place that I offered the customer on the phone the additional advice:

Whatever it is you are holding onto, get it out of you! Colitis (I believe) is all about the things we hold onto. The things we store in our gut that don't belong to us. It's hard to move in this world when you have to haul around your stuff and everybody else's. I told Carol, the customer, "Write a letter to everyone that you have issue with. Be honest and use whatever language you need to use to get the angst, anger, resentment and whatever else out." Once the letters were written, I instructed her to put them in envelopes and address them, but not to seal them. The next step was to place the letters somewhere and walk away. "If after about two weeks you feel compelled to send your letter to the addressed, go for it. If after two weeks, you find that writing was all you needed--burn them. Whatever you do, get the stuff that's making you sick out of you, so your body can find balance." At this last part, Carol sighed heavily like a weight was being lifted off of her.

I shared my story and the energy on the other end was a little lighter than when we first began. Carol admitted that there were some family issues and that those issues were a contributing factor to her depressed state. She liked the idea of the letters and was very appreciative of the suggested remedies. "Bless you Risi," she said, "Thank you so much for what you have said." The phone called ended with well wishes and we both felt like she had a good plan to go on. I hung up the phone and was left to ponder my own imbalance: What was I holding on to?

While I still am not sure of the connection between this current illness, I do not doubt that it is there looking me right in the face. In sharing this week's insight, I continue to recognize the healing that comes when we are able to look past our physical ailments to a deeper place where the imbalance truly lies. Our bodies our powerful, adaptive machines that will always put out what we put in. The key to discovering the connections is in keeping up with our input and b-not being afraid to let go of those things that do us harm-ALL of it.

Fridays at Smile is a reflective piece based on the insights I gain during my weekly shift at Smile Herb Shop. The names are fictional, but the stories are real.

July Workshops

2010-07-14T10:46:00.004-04:00

This month I will be hosting three workshops as part of the ongoing series at Smile Herb Shop. All of the workshops are $25 and require pre-registration.

"Natural Care for Black Hair"
Monday, July 19th | 6:00 pm-7:30 pm
Saturday, July 31st | 2:00 pm-3:30 pm

THIS WORKSHOP IS FOR ALL HAIR TYPES AND TEXTURES. Designed with Black women in mind, this workshop will discuss a variety of natural options for regular hair care and maintenance. This class will address care for all hair types: relaxed, pressed, natural etc. and is geared towards creating a healthy hair environment.

Risikat will offer basic tips and share a few remedies for issues like: dry scalp, hair loss, thickness, growth and more. Students can also bring in the products they already use for feedback, and should also be prepared to sample some of the suggested products. Class size is limited to 12 students in order to accommodate questions and concern.

"Creating Ritual & Sacred Space"
Saturday, July 24th | 11:00 am-12:30 pm

This workshop designed to empower students to create rituals in daily life. By separating habit from ritual, Risikat will discuss and guide students towards recognizing the importance of daily ritual and the value of deeming space sacred for overall balance. Herbs, cleansing rituals, altar creation and more will be discussed. Students will learn to create balance through daily conscious action and sacred space building.

All workshops will take place:
Smile Herb Shop
4908 Berwyn Road
College Park, MD 20741
301.474.8791 call for registration

Smile Newsletter: July Edition

2010-07-14T10:41:00.003-04:00

This month's edition of the newsletter has all kinds of great tips for summertime herb use and travel. Also be sure to check out the special coupon inside. Click here for the entire newsletter.

Smile

2010-06-08T20:59:00.004-04:00

Currently, I am the editor of the Smile's newsletter "Inner Smile". Starting in March of this year, we decided to make the newsletter available electronically. Each month the newsletter is based around a theme and this month's theme is men's health. Learn about herbs that men can use to improve their overall dynamic wellness and get a complete listing of upcoming classes in June.

Click here for the June edition, or review previous issues listed in the right-hand column.

Black Hair Care Workshop

2010-06-08T20:17:00.005-04:00

As an herbalist working at Smile Herb Shop, I often get questions from Black women on how best to care for their hair. I decided that it was time to create a workshop around the topic. The first two went so well in May, I am offering two more sessions in June.

“NATURAL CARE FOR BLACK HAIR”
Wednesday, June 16th: 6PM-7:30PM
Saturday, June 26th: 12PM-2PM

THIS WORKSHOP IS FOR ALL HAIR TYPES AND TEXTURES. Designed with Black women in mind, this workshop will discuss a variety of natural options for regular hair care and maintenance. This class will address care for all hair types: relaxed, pressed, natural etc. and is geared towards creating a healthy hair environment.

Risikat will offer basic tips and share a few remedies for issues like: dry scalp, hair loss, thickness, growth and more. Students can also bring in the products they already use for feedback, and should also be prepared to sample some of the suggested products. Class size is limited to 12 students in order to accommodate questions and concern. Cost: $25 Pre-registration is required by calling Smile at 301.474.8791.

Location:
Smile Herb Shop
4908 Berwyn Road
College Park, MD

Smile has several workshop offerings in various areas of herbalism and Ayurveda. Click on the link to the June newsletter (to the right) for more details.

New Year, Same Goals

2010-01-03T15:53:00.002-05:00

Greetings and Welcome to 2010!

I decided this year to bring in the year quietly and with a ritual. Having just acquired a new cauldron on the last day of 2009. I was determined to use the energy of the full/wishing/blue moon to my advantage and bring forth opportunity and abundance. Rituals are very important to the maintenance of balance and as I prepared and then performed, I found a peace and stillness that is often absent in my daily life. The goal for this year is the same as last year: expansion and abundance. The only difference is that this year, instead of being carried by the waves, I will ride them.

What exactly does that mean you ask? It means that I am making more space for me and using the seasons to help me along my busy path, This is the time for hibernation. Even as I write this it is a blustery cold day that has kept me indoors. In a few however, I will brave the elements to go to yoga and reassert my 30 in 30 challenge. I am on a mission to to do 30 sessions of Bikram yoga in 30 days. I have gone for 15 straight days and took an unplanned break yesterday, which means that in order to complete the challenge, I will have to do a "double" or two sessions in one day. The yoga has opened me up in amazing ways and while it has been hard to stay motivated, all I need to do is get to the studio and I am aligned with spirit. I realize that it has become a ritual that grounds me. The wrong food, the wrong time, not enough sleep, too much partying, etc and my practice becomes strenuous for that day. The beauty of it is that I can go back the next day and regroup for another try.

This week's lesson has been all about taking baby steps and humbling the self for spirit. In the studio it is you and the heat. The same postures are repeated every time, so you are able to gauge your growth. You are also forced to look at yourself in the mirror, something I absolutely don't do. In the space of yoga, I am slowly chipping away at years of tightness and pressure. I am releasing the "shoulds" in favor of "dos" and finding that even in the most difficult poses, where my breath is short and and my muscles are tight, there is peace.

I engage in the practice ultimately as a tool for peace and want to learn how to take that peace out of the studio into the world as I go about receiving the abundance, I conjured as we moved into a new decade. Welcome to 2010, let's see what she has in store.

Ese

IA

Getting Ready to Step Into the Light

2009-02-14T07:26:00.002-05:00

Greetings-

I was in the midst of preparing for today's workshop, when I was struck to stop and take a minute to reflect. The past few weeks have been really hectic as I prepare for an event that I produce called "When Harlem came to Paris". The event itself is a lesson in mediumship as the artists involved portray actual figures from the 1930s. There is no script, so the artists must learn about the people they are portraying and "become" them for the night. The buzz is building and it has me in awe of the progress I have made along my path.

Recently, I did a radio interview with Amina Carter of WomanSphere By Amina and we talked about many things. She said I was a "pioneer" and I found that an uncomfortably fitting description. Surely, there were people before me who traveled the same path and as the saying goes, "There's nothing new under the sun." But as I sit here and do a mini review, I think Amina may have a point and I humbly accept the compliment. I am determined to live a life that has width and depth. Everything I do reflects that desire and even when things don't pan out as I would like them to, the effort of digging deeper is always worth it.

Life is more than what you make it, it is also how you live it. I am presenting at "Loving Self" today, because there are things I want to share and feel are valuable. There are so many things at our disposal to make this life a little sweeter. The talk today will be a great deal of fun; I can feel it! In pulling the seminar together, I am more than excited, I am at peace. Things are moving in a forward direction and the goals I set so long ago are coming to fruition. As scary as it looks sometimes, I am ready to step into the light and be recognized and noticed. I want people to see that it is possible to live a life of width and depth, but it takes hard work, action and most of all faith. The light is truth and in that truth there is no place to hide, so take heart and know that we are all built for the journey that we are on and embrace those things that you want--fully.

IA

"Loving Self" Workshop: Saturday, February 14th

2009-02-02T16:12:00.007-05:00

I have been wanting to conduct more workshops, so I am partnering with my AZA sister Andrea on a first of many to come. The point of these will be to present information in "bite-sized" format so that attendees can enjoy the information without being overwhelmed. This first one will explore herbs, rituals and moon cycle basics.

"Loving Self: Herbs, Rituals and Moon Cycle Basics"

Saturday, February 14th
2:30pm-4:00pm
Emergence Community Arts Collective (ECAC)
733 Euclid Street, NW-WDC

Event Overview:

This workshop will offer three mini-sessions in one!

* Herbs for whole female self-care;
* How to create daily rituals for physical, mental and spiritual well-being;
* Introduction on lunar cycles and how to create your own lunar rituals.

Presenters:
Risikat I. Okedeyi, Iya Agba Centering Services
Andrea R. Thompson, Daughter of Waters

Light refreshments will be served. Loose tea, bath and oil blends will be sold at special seminar pricing.

Woman Powered By:
LiL SoSo Productions, Make It Happen Consulting, Daughter of Waters and WomanSphere by Amina

For more information and registration log on here!

February Herb of the Month: Damiana

2009-02-02T15:58:00.003-05:00

February: Damiana (Turnera aphrodisiaca)

While love should be celebrated year round, February is often the celebrated month of love. In keeping with such earth plane traditions, I figured damiana would be a good herb to highlight. While it has many properties, it is known for its aphrodisiatic qualities. Now please don't rush out and go buy buckets of this herb. It's not going to get you in a 'raging" mood. It's properties are very subtle. In a nice blend that includes, rose petals, lemon balm and a touch of spearmint, this herb can be a delicious starter for and evening of sensual pleasure. It can also be used to decrease anxiety in a variety of stressful situations. As with anything that reduces inhibitions, damiana helps to bring out what is probably always been there.

You can find it in loose and pill form at Smile Herb shop. For more information click here.

January Herb of the Month: Astragulus Root

2009-02-02T15:05:00.007-05:00

Greetings!

My apologies for the laxness, but with all of the new change ushering in 2009, I was swept away.

Astragulus (Astragalus membranaceus)

When I started working at Smile I still suffered from mild attacks as a result of a 1998 diagnosis of ulcerative colitis. This chronic dis-ease is essentially an auto-immune disorder, where the colon does not function normally. A severe form of irritable bowel syndrome, it becomes "ulcerative" when blood loss becomes an issue. Upon supplementing daily with Astragulus root tea, I found that not only was I better able to manage the colitis, but I wasn't as sick for as long. Astragulus is known specifically for it's immunity boosting elements, but it also has other really great properties.

Traditional uses include the treatment of the following:

Colds and influenza
Persistent infection
Fever
Multiple allergies
Asthma
Chronic fatigue
Fatigue or lack of appetite associated with chemotherapy
Anemia
Wounds
Heart disease
Kidney disease
Hepatitis
Stomach ulcers

It is also used to treat general digestive disturbances, including diarrhea, gas, and bloating.

Astragulus root can be found as a loose herb, as a tincture and in capsule form. I have found that conitnued use in a tea form, really helps keep the immune system charged and makes it harder to get and if you do, stay sick. I found in the first two years of continued use, my normal seson of sickness, was reduced by 85% and my colitis was easier to control.

For more information click here.

December Herb of the Month: Calendula

2008-12-24T15:51:00.002-05:00

December is all about going within. This year it seems that with the extreme temperature drops going within is more welcomed than usual. Much like November, December is filled with the "ickies" as germs and allergens abound. The continued use of elderberry is always recommended However, myy discoery a few months ago that Calendula actually increases white blood cell counts, made it my immediate choice for December.

Calendula officinalis or "marigold" is a particularly potent combatant for issues surrounding skin and inflammation. I often recommend it to client who have skin issues with acne and psoriasis. It is an excellent external and internal cleanser and its dazziling yellow color adds to its healing energy. David Hoffman offers this list of indications below:

Calendula is one of the best herbs for treating local skin problems. It may be used safely wherever there is an inflammation on the skin, whether due to infection or physical damage. It may be used for any external bleeding or wound, bruising or strains. It will also be of benefit in slow-healing wounds and skin ulcers. It is ideal for first aid treatment of minor burns and scalds. Local treatments may be with a lotion, a poultice or compress, whichever is most appropriate. Internally it acts as a valuable herb for digestive inflammation and thus it may be used in the treatment of gastric and duodenal ulcers. As acholagogue it will aid in the relief of gall-bladder problems and also through this process help in many of the vague digestive complaints that are called indigestion. Calendula has marked anti-fungal activity and may be used both internally and externally to combat such infections. As anemmenagogue it has a reputation of helping delayed menstruation and painful periods. It is in general a normalizer of the menstrual process.

(Source: http://www.healthy.net)

Calendula products abound and can be found in everything from my "Autumn Leaves" tea blend to soaps, ointments and even oils. To purchase calendula loose or in its varied form log onto: www.smileherb.com

Re-Communing with Spirit

2008-12-22T16:07:00.005-05:00

I remember my mother being quite the witch growing up. It was her answer to our childhood inquiries on how she always knew things like when we were lying, or upset. She would say, "You know I'm a witch," in answer to our awe and dismay. As her child, I accepted this answer and quite honestly felt somewhat empowered by having a mother who was a self-claimed witch. I remember thinking she was just naturally powerful. It wasn't until I was older that I realized that while she had natural leanings, it was the ritual of prayer that kept her fortified. It was also the lack of ritual that eventually led to her dimmed inner light that shone brightly when I was younger. Those moments of "dimness" happen to me from time to time and when I become aware of this fact, I realize that I have "fallen off" and must re-engage with Spirit.

At one point, I started each day with a tarot pull to help ground me in "the now". I do a simple three-card spread where each pulled card represents: the dominant energy for the day, the players involved and how I might be affected. The ritual was less about "prediction" and more about awareness and intention setting. The pulls empowered me with the information to gauge the people and happenings around me, it was like the first time I put on prescription glasses and wondered, "Did I always see so clearly?" As I slipped away from this particular ritual, I became foggy and unorganized. In not carving out time for this very simple ritual, I lost focus.

This is not to say that before tarot pulls I was clueless, but I am finding that as I expand in my higher self, there are tools that become a necessary part of my journey. While I can sense things without having used a pulled card, to start the day without my ritual is the equivalent of not stretching before a run. While I will be able to complete the run in both cases, the instance where I didn't stretch beforehand, means more soreness and pain later.

"Falling off" is a very common thing and very much part of the human existence. The issue of consistency is one that has been a lifetime struggle. I know that without consistent ritual I lose my ability to be active in the spiritual realm, but it doesn't make staying the course any easier. When we don't engage Spirit actively, we lose the ability to tap into Spirit easily, especially when we most need it. This is something I am learning and in doing so, understanding what it takes to re-commune when I have lapsed.

In September, things sort of "fell apart" for me. If I had been doing my daily pulls consistently, I probably would have pulled the Tower card at some point. There was drastic change that affected me in so many ways and I had a bit of a breakdown. Whie this breakdown was not necessarily visible to those around me, it profoundly affected my ability to tap into Spirit. There was fear and anger and a host of other emotions that I found very difficult to engage. I just shutdown and shifted to autopilot. It wasn't until recently that I was able to step back and breathe a little. I looked up and my space was dim, light was not being created from the inside and I was relying on Spirit for EVERYTHING. I was just trying to survive and in those moments of desperation, I let go of those rituals that had previously kept me awake and aware. I essentially, fell asleep.
I "woke up" in early December as I prepared a presentation on my life story, or at least part of it. I looke around and noiced how dull everything was. My altars were not as clean as they should be. I wasn't burning candles like normal and my spiritual work station was collecting dust. That morning I cleaned, did yoga and pulled three cards. Just like that, I felt renewed and energized. In reviewing my notes from previous pulls, I noticed I had not consistently pulled for over a month. The first pull of my renewal, spoke of an end of a cycle and new lessons to be learned.

While I am still working my way back to center, I see how the cards inform and how ritual pulling, much like wearing bindis, forces me to focus. Tomorrow is my mother's birthday. I have endured life without her physical presence for 16 years and I want to honor her on her birthday with a special initiation ritual that will humble me before Spirit and renew my path on this plane.

Re-Communing with Spirit is not hard, but it does require humility and the acknowledgement of how your spiritual absence affects your abilities. Everyone is diffrent, but here are a few suggestions:

CLEAN: Spiritual work of any kind cannot be properly done in an unclean environment. Wash ritual clothes and tool, empty incense holders of ash, clean away dust, etc. Sage is a great way to cleanse with smoke, but sometimes things need physical cleansing as well, so use a little elbow grease and remember that energy must flow throughout. A cluttered or unclean space = stagnant energy.
REESTABLISH RITUALS: Whether it is daily tarot pulls, seated or walking meditation, bring back those personal rituals that you used to do. Focus on those rituals that left you energized and focused. Communing with spirit is different for everyone, so find those practices that speak to you and jump right in!
FORGIVE: Sometimes we are so hard on ourselves that we can't get past our own egos, which is really what forgiveness is allabout. So you slipped up, so what? Once you awaken, forgive yourself and keep it moving.
ENJOY: There is joy in a good yoga practice, a sweet smelling incense, a beautifully cast spell or heartfelt prayer. Spirit should not be treated as this brick wall that you must smack yourself against. Instead view Spirit as a non-judgemental force that gives you what you ask for. Nothing done is nothing received, so enjoy the love and energy that is Spirit and you will find that it will be easily returned.

SIDENOTE: I started this post two days ago and am just now finishing it up. Right now, I should be in Florida visiting family. I had a standby ticket and the flights which were open two days ago, were oversold by the time I arrived . After two failed attempts to get on a flight, I decided to go home. Before I left the house, I felt compelled to light a white candle on my personal altar to serve as my "beacon" while I was away. I did my three-card pull and the card representing the dominant energy for the day was The Hermit. It was hard to be frustrated by the day's outcome with such prior knowledge.

IA

Personal Responsibility: Energy Shifts With a Punch!

2008-12-04T13:51:00.005-05:00

I met with some of my students today as they prepare for their impending final exams. As a community college instructor, I am constantly aware of the energies of my students and often have to guard myself in the teaching process. It can be very taxing being around people, who essentially and genuinely "need" you. The neediness increases or decreases depending on the student, but I find that the closer we get to the final submissions, the more spent the teaching and meeting sessions leave me.

Today, I met with a student who about two months ago sent an email expressing just how desperate she was to pass the course. We set up a meeting and she didn't show. She had had a family emergency and was unable to attend the meeting. In her previous email, she was concerned about her grades and made it clear that she didn't have the money to take the class over, so she really wanted feedback. I told her to reschedule when she was ready and we never met--until today. Tomorrow is the last day for her and her peers to submit the assignments which will determine their final grades. The last assignment was assigned about two and a half weeks ago and has been the focus of the class ever since. Throughout the assignment process, I have repeatedly asked for drafts and offered in-class help to students with questions. This student along with a few others, never once produced a written draft of any kind.

As we were reviewing her paper, I could feel her tension and anger as I pointed out all of the errors and made it very clear that she was in danger of failing the assignment. At one point, it looked like she was going t o cry. I stopped and looked at her and said, " I have to say I am very disappointed that the day before the final is due you are just now bringing me something to look at." I went on to remind her of her email, failure to reschedule and the weeks that passed by with me reviewing papers in class, none of which, were hers. She of course had no response, but it struck me in that moment how her energy changed. Before I made my appeal, there was outward irritation towards me as I reviewed her mistakes. When I pointed out her lack of effort, there was a change, a shift that landed the previously outward energy squarely in her center core. She, in that moment, realized that if she failed it was no one's fault but her own.

We are our own responsibility. Ultimately, failures and successes are largely determined by how much of ourselves we put into a situation. True failure is not a simple "A" or "F" as in the above case. It's about genuine effort. Too many times, we try to look to Spirit as if to say, "How could you let this happen?" As if Spirit told us to buy shoes instead of pay a bill, or stay out late when we knew we had an early flight. We live in a world where personal responsibility is easily dismissed in an effort to shift the blame (insert government bailout example here). However, in keeping things true and honest, too many times WE are the reasons for failed relationships, unpaid bills, unfinshed projects, etc. The key is to accept and take responsbility for how much effort we put forth, and work towards the center.

Tomorrow that same student who experienced that brief moment of clarity will submit her final papers. From now until 9 am tomorrow, the difference between her success and failure will depend largely on what she does with the feedback she was given. In the end, will it be an issue of blame or responsibility? Time will tell as with all things, but in the short term, so will her final grade.

IA

November Herb of the Month: Elderberrry

2008-11-21T19:37:00.006-05:00

November can be a little deceiving because it's technically the month of Fall, but be careful! While the leaves are turning (in some parts of the U.S.) and folks are getting into the long-sleeved gear, mold and bacteria are gearing up for flue season. Don't be caught off guard, with a weakened immune system.

Elderberry is a dark blue or purplish looking berry from the elder bush. Found in various parts of North America and Europe, it is known for it's immune boosting properties. The berries have been proven to aid in the resistance to viral infections (particularly influenza and herpes) and is also a great anti-inflammatory herb.

Source: The Pocket Herbal Reference by Rita Elkins, M. H.

Elderberry can be made into a tea using the loose berries, as a tincture (herb is extracted via alcohol infusion) or my favorite, as a concentrate. As a preventative measure, take elderberry as a daily tonic. I actually add the concentrate, which is sweet and tangy, to what ever tea blend I am drinking in the morning. You can also add it to water or juice. I try to get in a morning and evening dose. At least once a day, I make an effort to get about two tablespoons mixed into about 10 oz of room temperature herbal tea, into my system. It tastes great chilled. All of the various elderberry forms can be found at Smile Herbs in College Park, MD (www.smileherb.com), for those of you in

If you decide to steep the berries alone in hot water, try to drink at least two cups a day to stave off colds and flu. If you do get sick, double the dose to help speed recovery. Tinctures can be taken in a little bit of water or juice; follow the recommended dose on the label.

The key to good health is awareness and prevention. Get your immune system ready for winter ailments by starting now.

Take Care,
IA

ReNewed Focus and Change: Ascension Plan

2008-11-18T18:29:00.007-05:00

A few months ago a sister friend of mine was in turmoil. What on the surface seemed like a case of the pre-thirty crisis, revealed to be more of a downward spiral related to spirit. Essentially, the "Higher self" that is commonly referred to as the "soul", or "chi" was in sever conflict with the "physical self". This conflict was showing up in all manners of dis-ease. She was miserable! She came to me and asked for help. What came from that request is what I now call the 21-day Ascension Plan.

This plan is designed to create compromise between the two selves by releasing the heavy energies of negativity, doubt and fear. The plan, which involves a combination of liquid fasting and raw rood consumption and has three very important week-long tasks with exercises. The goal is to remove the blocks by:

1. Assessing
2. Accepting
3. Acting

The key to the success of the plan is not in not eating or drinking certain things, but in getting through each week without self-judgment. The results so far have been pretty amazing as clients leave the plan feeling "lighter" and grounded. I am now opening up the plan to everyone and wanted to share some thoughts regarding its content and practice.

Why fast?

We spend a GREAT deal of time eating as a substitute for EVERYTHING. It is always interesting for folks who are not fasters to realize how much of their lives revolve around food when they begin the process. By removing food, you are able to see just how much time you actually have. You also uncover habits that may hide behind food consumption. Ultimately, when you go without food, you are forced to realize how blessed you are to be right where you are.

Who should/n't fast?

This is a decision you should come to on your own. If you have any health restrictions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, IBS, etc. you should let me know so that I can create a modified plan to accomodate your concerns. This plan is not medical advice and is really at your own risk. I work from a place of spirit, but live on the earth plane. As a result, I am forced to recognize that there maybe some people who might attempt this plan without revealing their complete status. Be mindful that Spirit works from a place of balance, so what you put out there does come back. Your intentions should be clear before embarking on this plan, if for nothing elese, honesty is where true change lives.

Why 21 days?

I am big on numbers and "3" and "7" are particularly powerful. The plan is essentially conducted over 3 weeks. The number 3 for many refers to the Holy Trinity,but I have recently discovered that it also refers to the past, present and future, which lines up quite divinely with the work that is done within each week. Each week last for 7 days and the number 7 is often viewed as a magic number of completion, which again lines up with the point of each week's task.

Are there any restrictions?

The plan does list what each week entails in terms of consumption and there are "restrictions", but ultimately the plan serves as a guideline. The founding element of the plan is that in order to ascend, you have to let go of judgment. Even if during the plan you eat a cooked meal or drink fruit juice, it's okay-- there is no judgment. If you go astray, get back on track as soon as possible. The reason for this is quite simple: this is your journey. You have guidelines, but only you can walk your path.

Will I lose weight?

This depends on you, however, I want to state now: This is not a weight loss plan! Fasting is a way to detoxify the body and change behaviors. I am always leery of weight-loss fasts, because starving yourself just to lose weight is not only unhealthy, it lacks humility. In this plan you will rid yourself of unwanted energies which can manifest into physical weight, but that is not the point or the goal. The lightness associated with the completion of the plan, is ultimately energetic.

How involved are you in the plan?

I offer various stages of help. At the basic level I am a coach of sorts. I encourage you to stick with it, but in a way that works for you. There are daily email reports and once the fast begins, clients have access to me 24 hours a day. Some clients will call me while they are at a restaurant and ask for help on menu choices, or ask how to supplement their liquid portion if they are feeling light-headed or uncomfortable. Usually, I am just a receiver of information, here for fasters to vent.

Is there a cost?

Yes there is a base fee of $35 for the plan itself. Depending on the client there can be additonal fees associated with custome tea and bath blends. I am also an herbalist, so I can create blends for clients that are specific to them. I also make bath salt blends that are great for additional detoxing and expunging negative energies. I am a healer and while I am driven by spirit, I too have to meet my earth-plane needs.

If 21 days seems like a bit much, stay tuned for details on my group fast for the end of the year. I started this last year as a way to introduce fasting to clients and the group aspect proved to be quite successful. Fasters check in online and receive tea and bath salt blends customized for whatever intentions each faster has set for the seven days. This is a transition into the new year that works similarly to the Ascension plan.

If you are interested in fasting or other spiritual assistance, feel free to contact me.

Brasil Diaries: Rewind to Boa Merte

2008-08-18T19:33:00.011-04:00

So sorry, I just realized that I failed to upload my post about Boa Merte. There were serious internet problems in the hotel yesterday and so I typed everything out, with the intention of uploading today. After reviewing my thoughts, I have decided to just start fresh, so here we go....

Boa Merte is a three-day (that we know of) festival that takes place in August from the 13th-15th. The Sisterhood of Boa Merte are responsible for holding this festival which literally translates into "the festival of the good death". It commemorates those ancestors brought over to Brasil from Africa as slaves and the end of their suffering either by dying en route, during enslavement in Brasil, or surviving until the abolishment of slavery in 1888. Some of the key elements include the rituals that are conducted by the sisterhood which are not always public, a procession to the river that re-enacts the assumption of a Virgin Maryesque figure and specific details on clothing, food and jewelry. The ceremonies are amazingly syncretic with the marriage of Catholic and African religious practices and aesthetics. There is nothing I can write here that will replace seeing it for yourself, so go to Brasil and see it for yourself. Side Note: NOTHING beats dancing in the rain to a samba percussion band!

I will say that there is a heightened sense of duty and purpose. People gather from all over the world if for nothing else, than to be a part of this special time. I felt completely at home and all of the "coincidences" of the day were no more than examples of the synchronicity that can occur when spirit is given its full space to exist. The children were especially fascinating as they participated, dressed in ritual clothing. I think that what I loved most was the continuity. Every face I looked at, reminded me of a family member or friend. Language, ethnicity and "race", were not strong enough to divide us. We were one people on a mission.

Living in America where these types of practices are vilified, creates a schism that is sometimes hard to get over. It's like one is forced to live a double life. Much like who you are "at work" versus "at home", people's spiritual practices and selves are often fragmented. Brasil does not force that separation and I think that is why it has been so underwhelming in terms of what I expected. I am not different here. I am actually quite normal. No staring, no bindi questions, no comments or romanticizing, it and I-- just are. The ancestors roam free here and show up as they please. The little girl in the picture to the left, agreed to be photographed by me in a separate photo. When I drew closer to show her the photo, she just kept staring at me. She wouldn't leave my side, so I asked if we could taeke a picture together. She leaned into me as I kneeled down and a friedn snapped the photo. When I looked at the picture I didn't see the same little girl, but my sister Sofi who transitioned in 2001. All day long, I felt her presence. The picture, for me, was final proof that Sofi was there and had just as much fun as I did.

Tchau

Brasil Diaries: Oshun said....

2008-08-18T17:38:00.006-04:00

I woke up this morning feeling VERY heavy. Brasil is supercharged with truth sayer energy and some underlying fears have started to come up and out. The big one.....MONEY. I am sitting in another hemisphere and all I can think about is my wallet. As a goddess, I can manifest things as I need. However, it takes a great deal of honesty and faith. I find that lately, it's harder for me to exist on the earth-plane from a material standpoint. There are always shortfalls when it comes to my financial situation, but in the end everything always works itself out. I know this and believe in it, because I live it, but this morning it was pressing on me hard. I am not sure what triggered these feelings, but I decided to deal with them openly and honestly.

Our hotel is situated on the coast , so I decided to visit the ocean and commune with Oshun, who is the goddess of large bodies of water in Yoruba religion. In Brasil the orishas, play a heavy role in the fabric of Brasilian culture and society. You see symbols of them everywhere and it is not treated as a "thing" to be separate from everyday life, but a necessary part of everyday life that is revered and respected. That being said, it only made sense to go to the water and have a conversation with Mama Oshun. As a fire sign, I find water to be helpful, especially when my fire is out of control. Depending on the tide, one can go out into what is essentially the ocean bed. I found this beautiful spot not too far from the hotel where there was this amazing rock formation that built up into what I assume was once a high point for viewing ships at sea. Sitting at the top of this formation, I could see pretty far out and it had the added benefit of feeling very throne like. I sat for a while just thinking, because I find it difficult at times, to speak to spirit out loud. At one point all at once there were these strong breezes and crashing waves that all seem to say, "I'm here and I'm listening." With that I began to speak of my fears, my uneasiness, my desires and my dreams. I gave thanks, asked for advice and sat still in a repeating cycles.

In the midst of my moment on the rocks, Oshun spoke to me and she said, "Don't worry, everything will be fine. You have to have faith and just learn to be. Enjoy the slow time and the distance from all that you know. You have much to do when you return, so use this time wisely. Don't take things so seriously." I had to smile at such simple advice, because the truth of the matter is that I do need this break Brasil has afforded me and no matter what awaits me when I return, I am up for the challenge.

The Orishas act as agents and in the larger scheme, at least from my perspective, are "pieces" of the divine energy that is in us all. They are those that choose to stay in spirit form and work on our behalf in the spirit-plane. They must receive offerings when their help is requested and this is often presented in all manner of ritual related to many indigenous religions, including Yoruba. At that moment, I didn't have much to offer. I had already decided to fast when I woke up, so I offered that up as I submitted my "petition". I figured sun up to sundown for three days was a small price to pay in return for the lightness I felt afterwards.

For me fasting is a straight forward way to ease challenging paths and according to my mother, a means of offering to God. I plan to repeat the ritual tomorrow and Wednesday just to re-affirm my faith in Spirit and myself. I have to say, I spent the rest of the day a lot lighter. I finally found a machine that would take my card and the fasting worked out nicely, despite the slight headache I now have. I took the picture to the left at the end of the day while my travel mates dined at this beautiful restaurant in Pellehurino. I took a few self-portraits, but this one is my favorite because a beautiful thought crossed my mind as I snapped the picture. When I look at it, I see a different me, the one longing to just be.

Oshun said to relax. Who am I to argue?

Brasil Diaries: Seat Numbers, Connections and the Goddess with the screw face...

2008-08-14T17:33:00.011-04:00

This is me on the train to JFK. I have to go back in order to tell this story. This is before the countdown post (below). Even with all the spontaneous crying that happened before I got on the plane, a Goddess was feeling pretty good. Me and my travel mates boarded our plane to Sao Paulo, excited for the journey to begin. Well, humans have a way of taking the pep out of anyone's step and I am only writing about this because I promised myself I would.

We flew TAM Airlines from JFK. I usually love traveling non-American airlines, because the customer service always seems better and the amenities in coach always seem so much more interesting. Well, not to soon after we got on the plane there was a problem. One of my travel mate's seat had been taken by a man who decided to sit with his family even though he was assigned elsewhere. It took about 20 minutes of round robin discussion to assess the situation only to have no one do ANYTHING about it. My travel mate ended up having to fend for herself and basically getting her own seat wherever she could find one. The flight attendants passed out water and mints.

We finally settled in, but didn't leave for almost two hours, during which I was knocked out. The night before and "crack of dawn" tripping up to New York had finally gotten to me. I awoke to dinner service and decided to watch a movie. That's one of the things I love about international travel. It's a great way to catch up on my, "would never pay to see this nonsense" movie watching. It was a good idea until, it became very clear that I, as an American, or English speaker was not the airline's target audience. Each customer had their own entertainment unit, which had three language options: English, Spanish and Portuguese. They had French and English subtitles for the safety video, but guess what? When I tried to watch ANYTHING that they had been programmed for the flight (movies, tv shows, cartoons), there were only two languages options: Portuguese and Spanish. Now I am not normally irritated by such things, but I couldn't understand how they could show nothing but American-made films, have the Portuguese and Spanish-dubbed versions, but not the original English versions. It took me about 30 minutes and confirmation from the flight attendant to realize that my console wasn't broken. After my moment of "What the hell?" and a smirk at the irony of it all, I decided I could do without watching "Made of Honor" or "What Happens in Vegas" and went back to sleep.

When we finally landed, I was ready to get off the plane! It was way too cold, extremely noisy and I had been bumped so many times I had to sleep on a slant, which resulted in a serious neck cramp. I figured, well at least the 10-hour leg was over, which was the bulk of the traveling. We just had to get through customs, re-check our bags and board our connecting flight to Salvador. STOP! Do not proceed forward, instead run through this maze like Algernon, just to be able to pass through the "Nothing to Declare" line. BUT WAIT! Now you have to recheck your bags by sitting in another enormous maze-like line where no one cares that your flight is boarding or that you don't speak Portuguese. "You missed your flight to Salvador, there is another one at 10:35 am."

This is what I looked like when I finally boarded our connecting flight to Salvador. Yes, I am a little puffy. Notice the lips and the eyes, I am a finger snap away from going off. To top it off they served ham and cheese sandwiches on the plane. I don't eat ham, so I was puffy, hungry and dehydrated. I curled up and went to sleep, disgusted and just breathing in my geranium essential oil which really helped to take the edge off. I just kept telling myself, "we are almost there, just take deep breaths and everything will be fine."

Two hours later...
This was the view from the plane as we descended into Salvador. I was completely mesmerized by the beauty of this image. It was a sign that everything would be fine because we had finally made it! So, I just smiled, thanked God for our safe arrival and buckled in to brave baggage claim. We are all now safely and cleanly in the hotel (pics will be up tomorrow) after having traveled for over 30 hours. Bahia is beautiful. I told a friend that from the sky it looks like Morocco, but on the ground, it reminds me of Nigeria.

These were the lovely ladies that greeted us as we walked into baggage claim. I got all fluttery in the heart chakra. Tomorrow is Boa Morte, which commemorates the Africans brought to Brasil as slaves. I am especially excited about what that trip which is two hours up a mountain side, will entail.

Our travel guide who picked us up from the airport, assumed that I had been to Bahia before. He said I "looked" like I knew the area. In a way I suspect he's right. I told him it was my first time to Brasil, but I should have probably said that it was the first time in this lifetime.

Stay tuned...

Brasil Diaries: Countdown to Takeoff

2008-08-14T17:10:00.009-04:00

I will be in Bahia from August 14th -22nd. I have decided to actually keep a running diary of things that are happening. This first post was actually written on Wednesday, August 13th around 7pm. I was unable to send it via mobile uploading, but have published it here censor free.

The trip to Brasil, is now upon me and I am filled with a mixture of apprehension, joy, fear and disbelief. I believe that we have the power to manifest our destiny by simply stating and believing things to be. I manifested this trip and as I sit at the gate, waiting for boarding to begin, I am really shocked at my reality.

The night before was spent with good people and amazing conversation. It was just the send off I wanted and some needed. It lasted into the wee hours of the morning and it is all I can think about while I work thru all of these feelings. The messages for me have been about becoming more emotional. I have been working to understand what that means, while all along trying to wade the shaky waters that that type of openness brings in me. I am love and it is reflected in all of the people in my life. Old and new, people have expressed genuine happiness for me and it makes leaving harder, but coming back so much richer.

As the tears of pent-up emotion stream down my face, I finally understand that message. So, I am going to Brasil carried by my abilities to manifest a destiny that has always been mine to claim.

Obrigada...

Message for the Stagnant and Heartbroken

2008-07-29T17:08:00.005-04:00

Recently, I have been running into several people experiencing high degrees of dissatisfaction with regards to their personal lives, specifically within the scope of partners and mates. Regardless of the language you use, we are all in some way, looking for love. The price is often way higher than it should be because there isn't an agreement between body and spirit. Instead of coming to an understanding within, we tend to look without our whole selves intact. The body and the spirit must agree, otherwise there is conflict. That conflict leads to dis-ease and then it's all down hill from there.

The saying goes when discussing love, "If you look for it, you won't find it." I tend to agree and think that "If you are ready and open for it, love will find you." But what does that mean to be ready and open? How can you tell if you are ready to be in a relationship, or when it's time to leave one? The key to these questions lie in how committed you are to ensuring your human success. The earth plane requires a great deal more attention to detail than most people are willing to acknowledge. It all boils down to honest self-evaluation and awareness. The following are things that I have learned and observed in the past few weeks, use them as you see fit.

*Who are you? There is no way to create effective and functional relationships with others, if you have no clue as to who you are. We are living in a time where masking our feelings, desires and even ourselves, is the call of the day. Like any lie, after awhile, it starts to unravel, until the truth is staring you right in the face. Be honest about who you are. You will attract the person that most reflects you on the inside. (Scary isn't it?)

*Be faithful. The universe does not want you to fail, but who is to say that you don't? We receive messages all day long, that are only of any real use, when listened to. Your spirit lies within certain parts of your body, your gut is one of them. You need to trust yourself and have faith in spirit. If something feels wrong, don't think it out to be right. We all have communities that love us and hold us dear, even when we screw up. Let the love of those that are true to you be your measuring stick, not the fear that comes in when faith is lacking.

*Be honest. There are a number of folks out there who are not being honest with the people they are with and there are several folks, taking shit from people in return. You have to take charge of your life and be clear on what you want and what you don't want. Any relationship worth having is worth working on, BUT to what extent? Don't confuse compromise with martyrism.

*Be consistent. We tend to be very inconsistent and then wonder why we have relationship issues. We say we want someone who is affectionate and then date people who are cold. We say we want someone who will accept us for who we are and then marry a critic. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Strike a balance between what is possible and what really matters to you and be consistent.

*Relate on your level. This is the biggest hit that I have gotten throughout the course of the past two weeks. "Level" in this case, does not relate to hierarchy, as much as it relates to self-awareness. As people come together there is a vetting process that should take place. At some point in every relationship, we all realize that someone is either on or not on, our level. It is not rocket science and it usually glaringly apparent. Even if you can't see it, your friends and family usually can. A functional relationship is functional because both parties share more than similarities, they have a mutual understanding about their place in the world and see a common goal that is attainable regardless, of whether that other person is in his or her life. When you are with someone on your own level, you are able to be a whole person, instead of the "two halves" rhetoric that is often associated with relationships, particularly marriage.

Heartbreak, disappointment and loss are part of life, because they teach us the lessons we need to learn in order make life on the earth plane fulfilling. Unfortunately the lack of communication between body and spirit keep us making the same mistakes over and over again. If you really want love in your life, open your eyes--it's all around you. Bring your body and spirit to the table and agree on a path forward, the rest will work itself out.

Humbly,

IA

High Fire, Wild Fire

2008-03-22T07:30:00.002-04:00

In preparation for an annual conference, I decided to fast. I enjoy fasting and lead group fasting sessions as a way to help those not used to fasting and support experienced fasters. I find that every fast is different. Some are effortless, while others can be extremely challenging. This recent experience was a little of both.

The plan was seven days. Odd numbers for me anyway, are more powerful and I tend to work with herbs and rituals that encompass odd numbers. The week went by quite nicely, although in the midst of the week,we have been finalizing promotional materials. I have also been on spring break from classes, which is another reason I was excited to fast.I have started my Bikram yoga practice again and was able to two days while fasting, so needless to say, it was coming together.

On Thursday this week, one of my clients had a gig and we were up until about 5am working on the promo piece after that. When I finally went to sleep, I had strange dreams that included an accidental murder and band gig where the band got paid in meat.in the dream I ate a lamb chop.

I woke up extremely disorientated and had a "hit" that I had pushed to hard.I was able to get up and finish the remaining work and went off to work a double shift at the herb store.A little after 5pm, I felt it-a burning sensation in my upper abdomen. The pain was familiar, but not something I had experienced in over 10 years when I was diagnosed with an ulcer.

I became slightly concerned after the pain increased and resulted in dry heaving. For those not familiar that is when you throw-up but there is nothing in your system. None of the water or tea came up as it had been absorbed from fasting, so I took heed and ate something.

Ayurvedically speaking, I am considered high fire. I make decisions quickly and am constantly on the move on various projects. The fire is necessary and when it is low or goes out, I become sluggish and heavy, on the other hand when the fire is out of control, it is just as damaging. I had to call on my support group to work things out while I tended to self and today I feel much better.Eating helped where drinking did not and sleep also brought things to a managable balance.

The lesson, know thy self. Instead of just liquids, I probably should just do raw foods at this time, where my fire is higher. It was a good run though, fasting brings change for me and it's clear in my space and my physical form that things are clearer.In the end it was a great experience and despite how I came out of it, to know my fire is that powerful is oddly enough, more endearing than disturbing.

IA

Functioning Distance

2008-03-15T08:16:00.002-04:00

It has been quite some time since my last post. I have always been more of a talker than writer, but that is something I am trying to change. In my role as counselor, I learn a great deal and I feel that it is part of my life path to be a messenger, so I am attempting to keep this blog as updated as possible.

The messages and lessons for the past few weeks have all centered around scarcity. There is a space where we sometimes get trapped and believe that we are not enough. This place would have us believe that we don't have enough of anything: food, clothes, money, etc. This "scarcity thinking" leads to "scarcity action" and before you know it, much like chicken little--"the sky is falling."

As divine beings, we all have the power to create our existence. With the popularity of The Secret, the Law of Attraction has been popularized, but at the same time misunderstood. Not only do you have to think it, you have to be the action that brings to you the things you want. But here's the rub-you don't need everything you want.

We cannot forget that the Universe, God, Ancestors, Spirit Guides know best. We as humans have only a very narrow understanding that no matter how heightened, is still only able to handle a few perspectives at a time. Sometimes what we want, in the long run, isn't good for us. And sometimes, we are our own greatest challenge. Scarcity is a reflection of being at "soul's edge". If you imagine your self as a point inside a circle, abundance happens when you are closest to center. The closer you are to the edge of your being, the closer you are to scarcity.

It is not always easy to remain centered, but it is imperative that you stay away from the edge. Life requires that you move and change, but growth happens when you are able to recognize scarcity and pull yourself away from the thoughts and actions that lead to discord. I have watched people around me in the last few weeks, and it is intriguing to see how we all deal with the pace of living.

As a ritualist, I realized earlier this year that a centered perspective was not going to be easy to maintain without ritual and herbal support. In preparation for a huge event, I felt myself gravitating towards the edge. In helping a colleague, I found a way to pull myself back to center and tether myself like a kite held by a rock. A daily tonic of ginseng, cinnamon, ashwaghanda, triphala and shatavari along with various tea blends enabled me to function at a distance. The constant offerings to me at my personal altar, created the necessary balance between this world and the next.

Instead of being in the "fray" of my life, I am now able to remain at center and handle things from almost an objective point of view. Yes, there are times when I want to smack someone, or even yell, but it's different now. Not being "caught up" is helping me work better and it is also allowing me to tap into that limitless divine energy that we all have access to.

In the end, the distance allows for clarity, without losing sight of what needs to be done. It is so necessary to remember ourselves as we journey and even more necessary to support our journey with sacred and divined action. We are human, but we are of God as well, to focus on one more than the other creates a schism that leads to the edge. Trust your instincts and honor your whole self, otherwise life will always be one of scarcity.

Take Care-
IA

Trust and Abundance

2008-01-13T09:09:00.001-05:00

In fighting my hibernation, I have realized that it was necessary. Being a bit of a gadget freak,I was a bit dismayed when my blackberry had a fatal error and my laptop's hard drive crashed all within days of each other. For almost a week, I couldn't conduct business "on the go" as usual. It was weird not being able to tell people I was on the way, or not having the capability to take work with me, but looking back, I understand what it was all about.

I had said in a previous blog that I wasn't ready to start 2008. I felt like I needed more time.Well you get what you ask for.The technical glitches were quite useful to that end. I came out on the other side feeling quite protected and ready to face the day as it were. Sometimes, we need to step away from the fray. Not for any other reasons, than to be with our own thoughts. In fostering a centered perspective, we have to be willing to not take ourselves too seriously and just let things flow as they like. Once I accepted that the phone and laptop were dead, it was easier to enjoy the space between dysfunction and function. Once both were up and running again, I felt better equipped to handle the things that need to be done.

Ultimately, I have to remind myself that I am only one person and that while it is important to be on top of things, it is equally important to be in the midst of things. The journey is richer when I take the time to be aware of it.

Speaking of journeys, I went up to NY for a client's show last week and returned early evening Saturday. In the short time I was there, I learned a great deal about my decision to converge all my skills and my joy in doing such. It feels good to take care of clients in a holistic manner.

In bringing the manager/counselor/herbalist/friend together, I am living my truth. I invited another client to tag along because they needed a break. Earlier in the week disappointment and despair had set in and this particular client needed to get away. The trip was chock full of laughs and the normal tensions that often accompany our trips was gone. Apparently, said client had had an epiphany-if you focus only on the negative, it eats you up from the inside out.

They realized how much they allowed negative thoughts to dictate their moods and actions and made a conscious effort to be more positive-minded. As a result, this was the first trip we have ever taken,where we didn't argue once. It may not sound like rocket science, but there is a simple truth that cannot be ignored. Thoughts have power. When they are negative they have the power to ruin lives. Those thoughts that come from fear particularly, only result in creating more fear. Fear if left unchecked, will leak into other parts of your life, until everyone around you is infected. This leads to a great deal more conflict and can have a devastating effect on the quality of your life, including your health.

We have the power to create our own reality with a simple thought. In going on the NY trip, I didn't focus on past trips and the tensions that often accompanied them. I just looked forward to a good time. It was so much fun! I saw a great show, hung out with beautiful people and picked up a new client. The client in need of the getaway, learned a little more about themselves and their capacity to be happy. The little challenges associated with travel were handled far better than in the past and by the last day,we were able to congratulate each other on trip well traveled.

As always, I am humbled at the amount of love in my life. In being part of a supportive group of folks, spirit moves freely and helps us all be better and whole. We trust each other and in doing so, allow bygones to be bygones and try to do better the next time around. This simple concept is not easily managed by everyone, but for those that make the effort, there is an honest reward.

To the universe, I say "Thank you for the lessons." To those who read this, I hope that in this you find confirmation and/or insight. Live a fuller life, by being responsible and present.

IA

The In Between: breaking the seal

2008-01-05T16:46:00.001-05:00

It is the fifth day of January 2008. I am not ready. I have had a difficult time making the transition into the steady action I expected to have in the new year. I am definitely no longer in 2007, but '08 isn't solidified just yet. The hardest part has been the underlying anxiety that lurks when I am not paying attention. I realize that regardless of the calendar, I am move at my own speed. In recognizing this I am working slowly towards the new year. I think I'm almost there, but want a little more time to myself before I begin.

How do you move at your own pace in a world that decides when people are allowed to take a break. Ideally, the holidays served as a signal that things had slowed down, but with the new year upon us, its as if break time is over and we are just supposed to pick up and keep it moving. The odd thing is normally I don't have a problem with this, but as of late, it has been hard. Instead of resisting, I am accepting and making smaller to-do lists that can be accomplished in my hibernation state. Oddly enough, according to some recent research, I have found that I fall under the Bear category in Native American religion. I guess hibernation is appropriate for now.

Howling winds of change...

2007-12-16T18:10:00.001-05:00

Greetings,

As I sit here and type this message, I can hear the winds howling outside. I feel protected and warm in my sanctuary and am ever thankful for the place I call home. Tomorrow I face what may be one of the biggest changes in a long time. I am anxious and think I may be breaking out in hives as a result, but know that it is time to face the music.

In my Goddess seminar, I often talk to women about the importance of "deal breakers". Everyone has a point, where once crossed, things change forever. Unfortunately, we often don't establish those within ourselves until faced with them. Women in particular have a natural capacity to love and if not forgive, accept all sorts of hurtful and harmful behavior from others. This capacity allows for abuse in relationships, low self-esteem, fear and the all pervasive doubt and despair. In the end by not establishing deal breakers, we don't know when it's time to walk away from a dysfunctional situation.

When we know what we will not tolerate and what the parameters for forgiveness are, we are able to create honest relationships. Let's face it, we are human and as such, will all make mistakes. No one is perfect and that is just the way it is. But, when mistakes are made, how we choose to deal with them, determines for me at least, where the deal breaker line is made. The key to deal breakers is that you first have to take responsibility for the role you may have played in the conflict. Once you have established this and made amends, then you assess what else needs to be done. The key, is starting with self. Even if you were the "victim" of bad behavior or discourteous treatment (please keep in mind, I am talking about wars, acts of genocides, or other malicious or random acts of violence and/or abuse), you still need to start with self.

In my other life, I work with artists and part of my approach is getting them to see themselves as valuable and relevant. Most artists are talented, but work from a place of fear. Very few are confident in their abilities and I think that it's largely due to the fact that as a society, "artists" are so prevalent that there is no respect for the craft any longer. Everyone thinks they are a poet, or a singer or a producer, when what we are often dealing with are people who are technologically capable and feel entitled by that technology to say whatever they want. I can't knock it, but as a manager, I have to understand how that might be intimidating and wear on a client. In any case, I am constantly cheer leading and trying to get my clients (some of them) to see what I see-confident and relevant people with something to say. A long-time friend and client did something that for me crossed into the area of "deal breakers" and in processing things I see where I was at fault and understand why I still have so much anger.

In this current situation, I saw success in pairing an up and coming client with a non-producing one. I have to say, in my opinion they are both immensely talented individuals and could really learn a great deal from each other, but alas, confidence, or lack there of, always throws off the best of plans. In short, a gig booked two months in advance was thwarted when one of the clients decided to pull out citing "not being needed" because of the inclusion additional instrumentation. The whys and whats are not as important as the fact that said client 1) agreed to participate and 2) demanded the title of music director or band leader because as it was stated the band would have to "lock into me". The decision to add instrumentation, was solely based on a meeting earlier in the week, where said client in acknowledging things were not ready, took no responsibility and made no guarantees that things would be ready in time for the last rehearsal. The previous rehearsals had been completely non-productive and shit to be quite honest, so that a rehearsal the day before the show was necessary. Even worse, in ditching the band four days before the show, this client not only left as a part of the band, but also as a leader. So four days before the show and a day before a major holiday, there is no show, just a bunch of emails back and forth and pressure to make this work in spite of it all.

Since the fiasco, I have been left with a very sick feeling that this person is no longer the person I thought them to be. What's worse is the behavior since the said incident, which has been at best indignant and egotistical. It took me awhile to pinpoint it, but I finally realize that the deal breaker in this case is a lack of honor.

There were 2-3 mitigating circumstances that have since been cited as reasons for the departure, but none of them are strong justifications for the 'back door" exit. The sad part is that 2 of the 3 sole-called reasons were in place when said artist agreed to participate and the third albeit a family issue, was of no concern initially, but became an additional reason after having assessed my role, I apologized for having them work together in the beginning.

It is hard sometimes to forgive in the midst of anger and I usually recommend a cooling off period before trying to sort through the muck. However, it has been almost three weeks since the offending incident and I find that I can't shake the anger. I also find that I can't see this as anything, but a deal breaker.

The resaon why self-assessment is important in the deal breaker arena is because sometimes,, especially with people that you are close to, you find that they have been offending for quite sometime. The only difference is that now you are the target or victim, instead of someone else. In reviewing our relationship, this behavior, though a gross example of unprofessionalism, is unfortunately in line with what I have witnessed when said artist has been presented with similar conflicts in other aspects of their lives. Unfortunately, this is a person that does not make decisions until forced. This is a person that will allow things to get so out of control that the decision has to be made by others or in doing nothing, a worse outcome presents itself. I have witnessed this and called them on it several times, but because it didn't affect me personally, I didn't see it as a deal breaker.

The sad part is that in realizing all of this, I find that outside of a really talented soul, I don't lose much of anything by their departure. The talent is there, but there is no heart, which is very necessary for what we do. As a friend, it started off well enough, but even by their own admission, they aren't really good at that either. In this space I understand that to not stand by my deal breakers, I am just as dishonorable as that client. In a way, I am more dishonorable. We all have to pay for what we do and what energies we put out into the universe. I cannot stay angry, because ultimately that energy is returned three fold.

I can accept that a line has been crossed and state what it will take to get back on track, but I cannot accept or condone any action that offends me so much to be considered a deal breaker. So, as I close I feel a sense of accomplishment and sadness. I know what I have to do tomorrow and that in doing so, I claim for myself dignity and honor in saying "I will not accept this". I also know that there is a chance that someone that has been part of my life for some time, may not be able to accept my terms and may walk away forever.

In the end I love myself too much not to demand satisfaction, so the deal breakers will have to stay. With them firmly in place, I am able to better protect myself and those around me. To cross the line, is to trigger a deep knowing that things are amiss and off-center. We all need deal breakers because while they may cause short-term anger and anxiety, they often stave off long-term dysfunction that ultimately tears at the soul and leaves it fragmented. You can love people, but some not so close, deal breakers allow us to love from a distance and maintain or self-love and respect. Ultimately, for me, those two are far more precious.

Until next time,

IA

Welcome....I am who she is..

2007-12-13T21:14:00.001-05:00

I am known by several different names, but" Iya Agba"is the essence of me. I decided to start this blog as a way to "dump" my thoughts and insights. There is so much going on right now and as I continue on my path, I find that the physical act of writing is sometimes too tedious and not fast enough. I am Yoruba by birth and while my path has been one mostly of intuition, spirit has led me through several transitions and eventual evolutions. I find that with each new layer, I shed skin and ties to people and material things. There are a great many of us out here making a way in the human world and it is important that as we grow, we still respect our human form. In trying to share what I have learned, I decided to take what I do and codify it into a tangible presentation. Thus, Iya Agba was born. I don't understand why I chose the name Iya Agba as a title for what I do, but at the time, it felt right. It is a Yoruba phrase and the loose translation is "old mother" or "old wise woman". It is also one of the many terms used to describe a priestess in Yoruba. Oddly enough, I didn't know that until I did some research, but when I consider my birth name is "Iyabo", which means "mother returns", it all makes sense.

I haven't been on this earth long, but I feel like I have been here before. I am constantly challenged by those around me, term my zealous idealism. I move forward and with each lesson, I am able to help those around me. My personal experiences have served as great teachers and I find the titles of "healer" and "teacher" more comfortable mantles than before. I want to help people see themselves in their true light, without fear and judgment. My work entails one-on-one and group counseling whereby I am able to listen intuitively to what people are saying. I am not a medium, but more of a sensitive listener and sometimes I get messages that are very specific to the person I am listening to. So far, what I have learned as I do this work is that most people are lying to themselves. While it's not malicious, it is harmful because there are a great deal of false realities being created in the place of this thing we call life.

Right now, I am in the throes of several different thoughts about my place in the communities I am part of, and many of the conflicts stem from an inability for most people to take responsibility for their predicaments. There has been a great deal of blame and anger and not enough love and responsibility, in recent weeks. I am actually very angry and have been working through it various rituals and honest review. It actually saddens me in a way that I am unfortunately all too familiar with, because these conflicts, for me signal a departure from truth, which for me is always a deal breaker. Truth and honesty are probably the two most important things to me and without them I am lost. I cannot exist or counsel in anything less a basic respect for these two concepts. With truth sometimes comes pain, but without it, there is no growth and ultimately now real change.

Life should be lived and experienced with a deep and conscious awareness, not treated like idle play. My mission is to live a full and aware life and in doing so, assist people in recognizing their power to create lives that are fulfilling and meaningful. We are blessed in this day and age because the information and the proof exists all around us. We have the ability to understand very simple concepts, yet, we complicate things with doubt and fear. As another year comes to a close, I look back and see so much beauty and joy, but I also see the challenges and the hurdles that it took to get to that beauty and joy. Life is short, either you evolve or you stand still. I, prefer to move forward. And with that being said, I welcome you to my world.

Until next time, be gentle with yourself.